Where's Bonnie's brain?

Scene on board the USS Starship ENTERPRISE...

Captain Kirk: "We are on a mission to boldly go where no man has gone before. To find Bonnie Vanak's brain."

McCoy: "I thought it was Spock's brain we were searching for?"

Spock: "My brain is here. Inside my skull. You are not being logical."

Kirk: "Bonnie Vanak's brain has been MIA. The Federation has informed me that a photo of it was posted on an intergalactic milk carton. The last report of any brain activity from Planet Vanak was weeks ago."

Lt. Uhura: "Captain, I'm receiving a sub space radio signal. The signal is coming from system located on Planet Vanak in the vicinity of Deerfield Beach in the state of Florida. I believe the system is Bonnie."

Kirk: "Put it on the ship's speaker, Lt. Uhura."

Ship's Speaker: "gah gah gah gah gah!"

Uhura: "It's more like a distress signal than a message."

Spock: "Fascinating. I am experiencing a visual image, Captain. Of a writer banging her head against the desk."

Scotty: "Probes and sensors indicate unusual activity on Planet Vanak, Captain. Family health problems, pressure from the day job, romance deadlines and hairballs."

McCoy: "Hairballs?"

Scotty: "Sensor indicates the stray cat she adopted is choking up a big one, Captain."

Spock: "A most curious creature, the cat."

Scotty: "Bonnie's circuits are overloaded, Captain. She's gonna blow!"

Kirk: "McCoy, can you do anything to fix her?"

McCoy: "I'm a doctor, not a writer, Jim!"

Kirk: "We need to find Bonnie's brain, but the odds are against us and the situation is grim. It looks like Bonnie's brain has vanished into the time-space continuum."

McCoy: "Pure speculation, but just a guess. I'd say she's alive, Jim. But her brain is dead. No, she's worse than dead! Her brain is GONE! SHE HAS NO BRAIN!"

Spock: "Doctor, you have an unsurpassed talent for observation of Bonnie's situation."

Scottie: "I think the Klingons stole her brain and are selling it on eBay."

Star Trek wave files.